The intersection of spirituality and allyship

Okay, okay. This podcast is called “Allies at Work,” so why are we talking about religion?

Across the globe, around 65% of the population participates in a patriarchal religion with male figureheads or primary deities. While there are matriarchal faith systems or traditions with female figureheads, it’s still rare to see gender equity in religion, even in the modern day.

In America at large, we often hesitate to name “patriarchy” as a problem because of its ties to Christian beliefs and our national values.

For some individuals, these inequities lead to a full rejection of spirituality. For others, religious doctrines can create a powerful foundation for exploring unique gender identities.

This episode is not intended to elevate or discredit religion as part of your allyship journey. Instead, I hope to do what this podcast always hopes to do—let you hear other perspectives and get curious about your own beliefs.

Meet Rayner Jae Liu and Amanda Reill

In today’s episode of “Allies at Work,” you’ll hear from Rayner Jae Liu and Amanda Reill.

Rayner Jae Liu is an Executive Coach at Spoken Word who is passionate about Eris and what she represents. Rayner emphasizes what male allies can learn about themselves by embracing both masculine and feminine archetypes.

Amanda Reill is a former female pastor who ultimately left the tradition because of the inequities she experienced. Amanda invites women to unpack their own beliefs, rebuilding trust in themselves, and invites men to be bold allies who call out injustice even in their own religious circles.

They present very different approaches to allyship and spirituality, but both are so authentic and unique. I think you’ll love hearing their stories.

A few favorite moments

“If men can actually start to get in touch with their own archetypal feminine, it doesn’t emasculate them whatsoever.”
Rayner Jae Liu

“Continually hold your theology up to the light and regularly consider whether it represents this God of love.”
Amanda Reill

“If we can start with an equity mindset internally, it becomes a lot easier to advance and manifest an equity mindset externally. No making yourself too big or too small, but having yourself be like a metaphysical Goldilocks. If I start with myself, it can often give me the ability to speak up and dare to speak up to actually shift the balance sort of externally.”
Rayner Jae Liu

To hear about the intersection of spirituality and allyship from an expert in Greek mythology and a former female pastor, listen to the full episode below.

Allyship action: Mental gender swap

At the end of each episode, I share an allyship microaction—something you can start doing right away. Today’s allyship action is the mental gender swap.

This tactic is a mental exercise where you swap genders in your mind after passing judgment on a woman. Ask yourself, would the same criticism apply to a man? Or vice versa.

Would her assertiveness be annoying if she were a man? Would you call his display of emotion embarrassing if he were a woman?

Why is it sweet when a man leaves early for a dance recital, but “not taking her job seriously” when a woman leaves early for parent-teacher conference?

Would you be concerned about promoting a parent of young children if he was a father, not a mother?

If the swapped result feels funny, interrogate that idea.

There’s likely some bias at play.

You can be a better ally in the workplace when you check your own thinking and make changes accordingly. (The same mental exercise works for older employees, people with disabilities, black leaders, etc.)

And if you’re looking to try out this allyship tactic in long-form, rewatch the Barbie movie or read “The Power” by Naomi Alderman. These mental gender swaps often feel funny to everyone who lives in a patriarchal society.

That’s how “unconscious bias” works. You’re not aware of it until you challenge it.

Eris and evangelicals, remote work and race

Spiritual traditions and gender allyship interact in incredibly personal ways—and these values carry over into our workplaces and the way we treat each other. We can be better allies at work if we better understand spirituality.

We can also be better allies when we implement more flexible work policies and speak up against microaggressions in the office. Tune in next week to hear from two women of color who are paving the way for more equity and empathy within their organizations.